Chaos in my Head

I have so much going on in my mind right now. I need to start applying for federal aid for school in January but its hard to know where to start. I suppose I'd start with the FAFSA, but there are grants and loans etc that want you to be accepted to a school before they decide if they want to give you anything ... Well, I cannot apply to school until I know I'm getting a loan because I can't afford it any other way ... ugh so dumb!

I'm thinking I'll be applying to 3 schools ...  SBCC in case the other ones don't accept transfers. UCSB, which will be my likely school due to the fact that it will cost a lot less than option number three and it will be close to home, not to mention that they have the classes and degree that I need. My third application will go to Antioch University. AU is where I started my degree in psychology, but I ran out of funds after just two semesters and because I did not yet have my green card yet I couldn't get a federal loan. But we got the green card in March after being here for 11 years, so I can finally get those loans I need (I hope).
I would love to continue and finish my education at AU, but the loan would be much too big and with a child I don't want that much debt. So I would have to get some serious scholarships or grants etc before I'd consider going back.

So between loans, grants and scholarships, my head is spinning. If you or anyone you know have ample knowledge about the subject please reach out to me! I would be very grateful!

Change is Inevitable

A baby changes everything

The way you see the world
The way the world sees you

How you feel about loved ones
How you feel about strangers

The way you talk
The way you walk
The way drive
The way you think

The way you feel about yourself
Your mind
Your body

They change the books you read
The movies you watch
The TV channels you choose

A baby changes everything
For the better

A baby changes your heart
Your capacity for love
Your feelings of protection
Your strength

A baby changes everything

Afternoon on a Hill

I named my new blog after a poem by Edna St.Vincent Millay. Her poetry is something that I have thoroughly enjoyed and this particular poem spoke to me now more than ever before. I think that this is because I am learning to the see the world in a whole new light through my baby's eyes. I am learning to take pleasure in the little things and finding a new level of happiness in life in general :)

I haven't gotten to write very much in the past 13 months. I am excited to start this new blog as I continue this amazing life with my love and my baby boy and also start the journey back to school, back to peak fitness and back to writing.

Here is the short poem by Edna St.Vincent Millay. Enjoy!

Afternoon on a Hill

I will be the gladdest thing
   Under the sun!
I will touch a hundred flowers
   And not pick one.

I will look at cliffs and clouds
   With quiet eyes,
Watch the wind bow down the grass,
   And the grass rise.

And when lights begin to show
   Up from the town,
I will mark which must be mine,
   And then start down!